The alcoholic shame

Well I've opened up a bottle
just hit the throttle
now lets go,

Im broke
Im dead
Im a crazy one
Im love
Im still crazy
Im sober
Im angry
and still crazy

I guess I was born this way
I guess this is just the way it is
founding women
found problems
looking at me through the bottom of a bottle
don't you get it?

I warn people all the time
don't fall of the wagon!
don't listen to that voice in your head!
these demons are dangerous!
but what do I know?
keep doing what your doing
so far, so good
it's pushed me away thus far
but keep going
and see what happens

One day I dream
I awake and all is good
I awake and everyone's clean
now that Im clean are you still attracted?
doubt it, looking at me with hazy eye's
stepping into the dizziness and loneliness
just sit there and stare

Fuck it, you don't care?
so why should I
you would hate me if I did
that's how it works
I get to sit and watch
taring things so close apart
and my question is always the same,
why?

In my dream I stand among the sane
everyone's happy and dry
Im with loved one's who won't choose the poison
over the one's they love

So just keep up your antics
although I feel bad I still hate it
can't come with you
because you won't stop
just like everyone else
maybe I should move on
attract a sober human being-
but that sucks,
I wanted so bad to be with you
but you so bad want to be with poison
so drink yourself stupid
kill yourself
fuck yourself
whatever yourself
it makes me angry you don't even try

Let's keep going,
I know a genuis
but where is he?
he won't play
he won't baby sit
he won't stay home
he won't stay clean
drinks from the nipple of the poison
just keep killing yourself
you've burned your musical bridges
you've shown your son your ass
so he can grow up and hate you
but again, fuck it
kill yourself like everyone else does
sipping the nipple of the poison bottle.